Nostalgia

A strong wind whipping the scent of freshly cut grass
Across the field behind the playground
Where I found the arrowhead
Hot pinch of stinger inside the shoulder of my t-shirt
Callused foot bottoms mildly poked by
Driveway stones
Camping near a green pond with small
Frogs splashing
The snap of taking my first stud earrings
Out to put in new pink and yellow
Ice cream cones
Rivers and their tributaries eroding my sandbox and floating
My brother’s he-men to the wooden corners near the grape vines
Laying face-toward-the-sun on a partially
Deflated
Inner tube in my neighbor’s above ground pool
The rubber prism grip on my pencil the first time I wrote my own name and
That wonderful new car-type smell
Hay stuck in the rolled bottoms of my
Jeans after looking for kittens in our hay loft
Fighting the force field holding my arms to the wall when
My evil brother “lex luthor” wanted to stop my wonder woman powers in
Matt’s basement
Going to visit Aunt Darlene and Uncle Ken in Cincinnati, excited to eat
Sugar smacks or any cereal our parents wouldn’t allow our flourided teeth
To chew
Rolling down a scorching sandune with sand in my bathing suit
Aug. 15, 2002

Cases of Basket

Seething with embittered passion
I wait and scrape and
Expect the impossibility of
So many possibilities
Back up and run over another ambition
Age defying minefield where I
Trip painfully
Wish I could move mainly
Without debt
Laborious, whittling new passions
Work toward a goal but lessens
The objective because I forever
Wonder where I went wrong
No wonder I choose not to hold
On for long

July 15, 02

Create

Embryonic mishap
That was our fate
Bastard of social conformity
Stop all to prevent deformity
Look now at what you create

Cancerous melancholy
Of those alone
Mosquito bite reaction
To losing life altering traction
More offspring others condone

A need to create
New born successors
Bare naked link between
Her lineage benefit seen
Lost weakness of feeling lesser
July 15, 02

Michigan's Canada

A country of metric
Minded filth
And
Legal
19 year old
drunks

July 14, 02

Cards in Car

I live in monetary desolation
Hopeful ruin without exhaust
Where I beg for my drinks but
Reside in luxury
Avoiding mean finance through
Others that love me
Happily chat with my potential assets
Curse them after positive yet unwanted response
Solve this with new credit card,
Pasta in a box and stubborn demand
Adult demeanor or satisfaction
The meaning and benefit of both, but
Possible like a cold July in Orlando
June 28, 02

Justin

White the way its supposed to be
White the way the grass sleeps
Memorable masterpiece
Green the way its always been
Green beneath the happy grin
Aggressive behavior and
Jarhead scowls
June 25, 02

Drugged

Wake up sweaty, entangled
Senses matted, like my hair
See him
Only 3 drinks—one from
His arm which flops over me
My thoughts garbled with
Urges of flight and panicked flashbacks that
End without conclusion

June 11, 2002