Lovely

my thoughts for you are chaos
my heart believes them more than any truth
the nonsense that fills my head
aching skull from memory loss
emptiness of my brain- just short of insane
and i love it
I'm reaching for my multi-colored recollections
floating in too many directions
knowing i'll lose some forever- wondering if i'll miss them
oh stars please tell me i'll never- have to miss you
but i already do
I'm waiting for my spirit to crush my soul
the weight of your purpose equaling my goal
while we anticipate, pre-meditate
is it your intention to procrastinate?
i refuse to blame fate
this ringing in my ears, now one else hears
penetrating my heart, complicating my mind
i'm not complaining, simply explaining
i'm only sorry it doesn't make sense
it's just too immense
within my understanding i linger
wanting to leave its safety- like dense fog
in the darkness i grope, suddenly grasping your fingers
into the sunlight you pull me near
i long forever to stay right here
Oct. 29, 1995