I want to improve the situation, but
You’re like I stepped in some shit
I can’t get off my shoe
Every time I hear a
Knock, you haunt me
I keep my drapes drawn
My volumes low
Hours of repetitive
MTV
Gotta get by
You are just my friend
Forgive me because I
Did this again
October 2, 02
Wednesday, October 2, 2002
Tuesday, October 1, 2002
Commonplace Dream
I long for banal schedule
Void of fraternal debauchery that
Eternally internalizes true relations
He benumbs any seismic situation
To spare my feelings
As I wade through dismal withdrawal
From knight-on-white-horse fantasy
I allow my delusion to fade
How I degenerate, how I long
How I let it all go to live this life
Of stimulation
October 1, 02
Void of fraternal debauchery that
Eternally internalizes true relations
He benumbs any seismic situation
To spare my feelings
As I wade through dismal withdrawal
From knight-on-white-horse fantasy
I allow my delusion to fade
How I degenerate, how I long
How I let it all go to live this life
Of stimulation
October 1, 02
Monday, September 30, 2002
Performance Anxiety
The yellow sulfur of loneliness bubbles in my brain
Socially quarantine myself for monetary gain
With more friends than I can remember
I grip my credit scepter like a competitive queen
I’m forced to present things as they seem
If I cupped my hands I might retain some of my fluid integrity
September 30, 02
Socially quarantine myself for monetary gain
With more friends than I can remember
I grip my credit scepter like a competitive queen
I’m forced to present things as they seem
If I cupped my hands I might retain some of my fluid integrity
September 30, 02
Thursday, August 15, 2002
Nostalgia
A strong wind whipping the scent of freshly cut grass
Across the field behind the playground
Where I found the arrowhead
Hot pinch of stinger inside the shoulder of my t-shirt
Callused foot bottoms mildly poked by
Driveway stones
Camping near a green pond with small
Frogs splashing
The snap of taking my first stud earrings
Out to put in new pink and yellow
Ice cream cones
Rivers and their tributaries eroding my sandbox and floating
My brother’s he-men to the wooden corners near the grape vines
Laying face-toward-the-sun on a partially
Deflated
Inner tube in my neighbor’s above ground pool
The rubber prism grip on my pencil the first time I wrote my own name and
That wonderful new car-type smell
Hay stuck in the rolled bottoms of my
Jeans after looking for kittens in our hay loft
Fighting the force field holding my arms to the wall when
My evil brother “lex luthor” wanted to stop my wonder woman powers in
Matt’s basement
Going to visit Aunt Darlene and Uncle Ken in Cincinnati, excited to eat
Sugar smacks or any cereal our parents wouldn’t allow our flourided teeth
To chew
Rolling down a scorching sandune with sand in my bathing suit
Aug. 15, 2002
Across the field behind the playground
Where I found the arrowhead
Hot pinch of stinger inside the shoulder of my t-shirt
Callused foot bottoms mildly poked by
Driveway stones
Camping near a green pond with small
Frogs splashing
The snap of taking my first stud earrings
Out to put in new pink and yellow
Ice cream cones
Rivers and their tributaries eroding my sandbox and floating
My brother’s he-men to the wooden corners near the grape vines
Laying face-toward-the-sun on a partially
Deflated
Inner tube in my neighbor’s above ground pool
The rubber prism grip on my pencil the first time I wrote my own name and
That wonderful new car-type smell
Hay stuck in the rolled bottoms of my
Jeans after looking for kittens in our hay loft
Fighting the force field holding my arms to the wall when
My evil brother “lex luthor” wanted to stop my wonder woman powers in
Matt’s basement
Going to visit Aunt Darlene and Uncle Ken in Cincinnati, excited to eat
Sugar smacks or any cereal our parents wouldn’t allow our flourided teeth
To chew
Rolling down a scorching sandune with sand in my bathing suit
Aug. 15, 2002
Monday, July 15, 2002
Cases of Basket
Seething with embittered passion
I wait and scrape and
Expect the impossibility of
So many possibilities
Back up and run over another ambition
Age defying minefield where I
Trip painfully
Wish I could move mainly
Without debt
Laborious, whittling new passions
Work toward a goal but lessens
The objective because I forever
Wonder where I went wrong
No wonder I choose not to hold
On for long
July 15, 02
I wait and scrape and
Expect the impossibility of
So many possibilities
Back up and run over another ambition
Age defying minefield where I
Trip painfully
Wish I could move mainly
Without debt
Laborious, whittling new passions
Work toward a goal but lessens
The objective because I forever
Wonder where I went wrong
No wonder I choose not to hold
On for long
July 15, 02
Create
Embryonic mishap
That was our fate
Bastard of social conformity
Stop all to prevent deformity
Look now at what you create
Cancerous melancholy
Of those alone
Mosquito bite reaction
To losing life altering traction
More offspring others condone
A need to create
New born successors
Bare naked link between
Her lineage benefit seen
Lost weakness of feeling lesser
July 15, 02
That was our fate
Bastard of social conformity
Stop all to prevent deformity
Look now at what you create
Cancerous melancholy
Of those alone
Mosquito bite reaction
To losing life altering traction
More offspring others condone
A need to create
New born successors
Bare naked link between
Her lineage benefit seen
Lost weakness of feeling lesser
July 15, 02
Sunday, July 14, 2002
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